Drugs And Depression

HOOK nu metal vocals (8 bars)

Woke up with the sun in my eyes, but the night still speakin’,
Heart heavy like the ceiling gon’ cave, yeah it’s creepin’.
I been searchin’ for a version of me that ain’t missin’,
But the face in the glass look back with no wisdom.
Drugs and depression—my only confessions,
Tryna find a direction in my own reflection.
All these questions echo loud in my head,
Why the hell you disappear when I needed you then?

VERSE 1 rap  (16 bars)

I woke up on a carpet that remember my sins,
Bottle toppled on the counter like it’s judging again.
My head poundin’, last night sounded like a war with a friend,
But I look around the room and I ain’t see no one in.
Start yellin’ at a shadow like, “You failed me twice!”
“You ain’t there for me or mom when we froze at night!”
“You ain’t teach me ‘bout the streets, how to fight the fright,
How to turn into a man, how to choose what’s right.”
“You supposed to be the blueprint, older version of me,”
“But your absence left me empty like a church with no seats.”
“How you vanish when the pressure made the walls all squeeze?”
“These tears ain’t mine alone—momma dropped them for weeks.”
My voice crackin’, but the coke got it sharp like a blade,
Words slur, but the rage keep ‘em perfectly made.
“You the reason that I’m broken, why my soul feel gray!”
But the silence in the room felt colder than shade.

HOOK  nu metal vocal (8 bars)

Woke up with the sun in my eyes, but the night still speakin’,
Heart heavy like the ceiling gon’ cave, yeah it’s creepin’.
I been searchin’ for a version of me that ain’t missin’,
But the face in the glass look back with no wisdom.
Drugs and depression—my only confessions,
Tryna find a direction in my own reflection.
All these questions echo loud in my head,
Why the hell you disappear when I needed you then?

VERSE 2  rap (16 bars)

“You ain’t there when the bullies put my back to the wall,
When the Hunger made my stomach start attackin’ us all.
When I swung for survival, you ain’t answer the call—
Every fight that I fought, every trip, every fall.”
“You ain’t there when the slumlords cut the heat in December,
Mom cryin’, tryin’ to hide it, but I always remember.”
“You ain’t there when my heartbeat started racin’ from pressure,
Sayin’ ‘man up’ to myself, but I ain’t know the measure.”
“You supposed to be my brother, ain’t you older than me?”
“We needed you—where the hell you s’posed to be?”
“How you look me in the face with no shred of belief?
If you loved us, why the hell you always chose to go leave?”
The liquor talkin’, but the pain is the one that’s in charge,
And my shadow on the wall standin’ tall, loom large.
“Answer me!” I shout louder, “Why your heart ain’t enlarged!?”
But the room stay quiet… silence hit me like bars.

HOOK  nu metal vocal (8 bars)

Woke up with the sun in my eyes, but the night still speakin’,
Heart heavy like the ceiling gon’ cave, yeah it’s creepin’.
I been searchin’ for a version of me that ain’t missin’,
But the face in the glass look back with no wisdom.
Drugs and depression—my only confessions,
Tryna find a direction in my own reflection.
All these questions echo loud in my head,
Why the hell you disappear when I needed you then?

VERSE 3  rap (16 bars)

In a fit of rage, fist swing—hit the face I despise,
But the world turn slow-motion, then the glass start to fly.
Mirror shattered on the floor like a truth in disguise,
And I freeze—broken pieces show the whites of my eyes.
No brother in the room. No shadow with a voice.
It was me the whole time—pain don’t give you a choice.
Drugs makin’ ghosts outta people you miss,
Depression turn your memories to people that don’t exist.
I dropped down to my knees, blood drippin’ off knuckles,
Tears fallin’ in the cracks like they searchin’ for puzzles.
I whispered, “Dad… why you never come help with the struggle?”
All my life I been arguin’ with a man that won’t hug you.
I’m an only child, talkin’ to reflections at night,
Hopin’ one day you’d appear, tell me wrong from right.
But the mirror can’t mentor, and the past don’t rewrite—
Just me, drugs, depression… and the will to still fight.

HOOK nu metal vocal (8 bars)

Woke up with the sun in my eyes, but the night still speakin’,
Heart heavy like the ceiling gon’ cave, yeah it’s creepin’.
I been searchin’ for a version of me that ain’t missin’,
But the face in the glass look back with no wisdom.
Drugs and depression—my only confessions,
Tryna find a direction in my own reflection.
All these questions echo loud in my head,
Why the hell you disappear when I needed you then?